open post.

[shield]

open to all for prompts and starters nsfw post

Comments

[shield]

Nope. Veto. Hard pass.

[futurist]

Got it. So eye contact while I suck you off and some light cuddling afterwards?

[shield]

Jesus. [ Steve's brain is stuck on that mental image. 404: brain cells not found. ] Okay. But that sounds kinda one-sided. What do you want?

[futurist]

[Play it cool, Stark.]

To be pounded into the mattress.

With emotion.

[shield]

Right. Okay. That's doable.

[ Is there smoke coming out of Steve's ears? He wouldn't be surprised. ]

[futurist]

Do you want to send a contract for my lawyers to look over? Required number of post-coital snuggling minutes and any other terms and conditions?

[shield]

It's even harder to tell when you're joking over text. But just in case, please don't get your lawyers involved.

[futurist]

No? You don't want to guarantee a certain number of orgasms per encounter? Your loss.

So, how do you want to go about our no strings attached yet still emotional hookups? Really, you gotta give me something to work with here or I'll just show up naked in your bed one night.

[shield]

Not on a recorded document drafted by your in-house legal team, no! I'll take the hit.

We use code words all the time in the field. Can't we make one up for when we're, you know? Ready?

[ Yes, he knows that doesn't sound good. No, he has no idea how to make it sound better. ]

[futurist]

The eagle has landed.

[shield]

You know what? I'll let you have this one.

[futurist]

That's good, because option B was going to involve eggplant emojis.

[shield]

Wouldn't that be easier to text?

[futurist]

Or you could just text a dick pic.

[shield]

[ After about 25 minutes during which Steve gets deeply invested in finding the right angle, he does in fact take a very deep breath and hit send on his dick pic. ]

[futurist]

I'd say that's an impressive bald eagle specimen right there.

[Tony absolutely did not expect this to happen and now he's internally freaking out a little bit.]

[shield]

Did I send you a dick pic or submit to National Geographic?

[futurist]

Well, it's a very nice dick pic.

[Jesus, Stark, get it together.]

[shield]

It was too soon, wasn't it?

[futurist]

What? No! No, the eagle has definitely landed. Possibly crash-landed on his face.

Um.

It's just. Not what I expected. I mean, I didn't expect anything, and, and that is. Definitely not nothing.

[shield]

Okay. Happy to exceed expectations. I think?

[futurist]

[Here, Steve, have a dick pic in exchange. It's only fair, after all, even if Tony feels insignificant in comparison.]

[shield]

Wow okay um. Eagle. Eggplant. All of it.

[futurist]

I gathered that much from your picture.

So, these ill-fated hookups. Male or female? Just so I can get an idea of your experience level.

-no judgment, I swear. I like to know what I'm working with.

God, why don't I have a survey for these things?

[shield]

Both. And I'm not filling out a survey.